The cab ride from hell
My cab ride with Emily was great. He didn’t drive excessively crazy. ( I think that was because there was a baby in the car.) He pointed out some stuff to us. It was really overall a pleasant ride. Up until I left, it was pretty much one of the only cabs I took.
Anyway, I needed to take a cab back to LGA. Our flight was at 6 am but I’m crazy and always want to leave really early so I know I’m personally there well before I’m needed. My friend Samantha and I were going to ride together since we had the same flight home and such. We had decided on 3:30am is when we should leave. When that time rolled around and I hadn’t heard from my cabbing buddy, I called. No answer. So I called again 15 minutes later and woke her up. No big deal because again, we were leaving exceedingly early.
Samantha asked if I could get a cab at the Hilton and meet her where she was staying. I said it was no problem and asked the man at the front to grab me a cab. I text Sam and said we’ld be there soon after 5 minutes and a cabby came up.
Before I even opened the door I had a short conversation with a woman.
Her:”Hey where are you headed?”
Her:”Do you want to share a cab?”
Me:”I would but I have to go get my friend before I go. I’m sorry”
Her:”Oh no it’s okay.”
She left with a smile and was very nice. I sit in the cab and tell him where I needed to go. Then I preceeded to tell him that we needed to go to LGA afterward. (At this point it will be a lot of dialog)
He takes off towards getting Sam. If you know me, I’m a very quiet person until I know you. I don’t like having conversations with people I don’t know. A way to combat that is to be on my phone and I usually don’t get bothered. That was exactly what I was doing at about 3:50 in the morning.
Cab:”Where you headed”
Back to the phone
Cab:”Chicago Nice? It big right?”
Me:”Yea It’s big”
Again sitting with my phone. At this point I text Sam to tell her that this Cab drive gives me the creeps. I don’t know why but he did.
Cab:”It better than New York”
Me:”Well it doesn’t have the night life like New York”
Because in all honesty, I enjoy Chicago a lot more than I enjoyed New York. I would also like to say that this driver yelled everything. I don’t think he knew what an inside voice was.
Cab:”You pay me when we get there right?”
Cab:”You pay cash?”
So we keep driving and he’s a horrible scary scary driver. Screeching halts and crazy take offs. Normally I get it you know. You’re trying to beat other cars. And you’re trying to get where you need to be or whatever but there were not many cars around.
Cab:”So what that woman say to you before you get in?”
Seriously? None of this dudes business. NONE! But I’m timid in person if I don’t know you though.
Me:”She wanted to share a cab but I’m picking someone up.”
So we’re almost there. He’s asking me to is if we’re near the right place. Yea. I’m from the Chicago suburbs so it totally makes sense for me to know where we are!
We finally get to Sam. She’s flustered because she woke up a little late. She gets in and we head off to LGA. He tells us no less than 7 times that there are tolls to take this bridge. It was $6.50 in tolls. Every time he yelled that their were tolls I simply said “Okay” or “I understand”. One time I had even mentioned that we had tolls in Chciago.
We’re driving and we get to the tolls in question.
Cab:”See look right there ma’am. It says it right there.”
Sam gives me a look because again he’s said it so many times.
Sam:”Do a lot of people think you’re trying to rip them off?”
You would think we would get a yes or a no. But not with this guy. He actually goes into a story about a woman who said she was going to LGA to fly to Paris. But she had lost her passport and had a photo copy. He had told her they wouldn’t allow her to leave.
He tells the whole story and then pieces of it again two more times. He’s like half hysterical with the yelling. I don’t know. The he asks us like 3 times where we are leaving from and what airport.
We FINALLY get to the airport. “Thank fucking god” was all that kept running through my head. I couldn’t wait to get out. But it was too soon to be happy because he couldn’t find the damn terminal. We had to stop and ask. Then we had to go back around. He took this curved road so fast I swore I was going to die.
So we get to the right terminal. He pops the trunk. The total was 33 and I honestly didn’t want to tip. He didn’t deserve it in my mind. But I wasn’t going to ask for change back. So we get out. He pops the trunk and I start grabbing out bags in because fuck if I’m going to wait for him. I just want to be done with it.
The I realized why the creep-o-meter was going off in my head!!
He gets out of the cab to grab the bags. His belt and pants are completely unbuttoned and open.
Yup. All I could do was fucking laugh because had I not, I would have screamed. It was just the fucking cherry on top of the ride. All I can say is thank god it’s in Chicago next year!